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    News 18 November 2025

    Making A Miele Of It

    James Buchanan avatar

    James BuchananDirector and Specialist

    Two years ago we set off some rockets scientists to try and pull together some machine learning / AI to make my life easier in identification of instruments.

    It didn’t work. In fact it became positively dangerous at points. There is a long discussion on Maestronet that discusses the possibilities of AI violin recognition. I feel confident in my ability to say that my job is safe for the moment.

    Anyway, I am not an expert on economics in fact I have only recently learned the correct way to pronounce the word. It also won’t be a surprise for anyone to learn that plumbing and car mechanics are also something of a closed book to me, but the good news is that I have Chat GPT to help me through these challenging times.

    So, first off, my car is fine except the bluetooth receiver didn’t work. Not the biggest surprise for a car that has been footwell deep in flood water, and as bluetooth is more of a necessity than a luxury – the police having strong views on calling while driving. I need to fix it.

    At the same time (did I mention I wasn’t an expert on plumbing?), having found an absolute bargain of a Miele dishwasher on Facebook marketplace and having installed it beautifully, I managed to break it within one wash cycle. How? Easy. I don’t read instructions – never liked being told what to do – and if I had read the manual then it certainly wouldn’t have been left by the previous owner in the dishwasher. One cycle in we have papier mache and something approaching despair.

    But… and this is where Chat GPT can come in and fix all things. For instance in my Golf it told me to rip back the carpet on the passenger side and give a healthy yank to the cables beneath. Well it was half right. It turns out that the passenger side contains silly little fripperies like airbag controls. The driver’s side is the place to look and give it beans. If only I had known.

    Not quite learning my mistake, I then proceeded to go for a diagnosis on my Miele. The obvious things tested (with the utmost futility), I then decided to whip out a new set of screwdrivers and get cracking. Before lift-off, Chat GPT asked me if I wanted the schematics for the machine. Well of course I did. Who wouldn’t? If I am about to reach into an electrical smorgasbord then it would be quite nice to know the horrors awaiting.

    I attach this so we can all know that humanity is doomed. There will be more deaths and accidents from Chat GPT than any saved hours. So am I an expert on economics? No. But I am almost definitely sure that newspaper reports of an AI bubble might not be exaggerated.

    As a side note. Thank you to those who have been in touch. Honestly it really isn’t that bad at all. Compared to our neighbours it is nothing, promise. The house is warm, dry, a little muddy in parts and currently hosting a white-goods mountain that seems to be growing daily.

    ——————————————————
    Our next auction is the Amati Affordable on the 26th and 27th November

    You can view the catalogue here: https://app.amati.com/en/auction/1129-amati-affordable-26th-and-27th-november

    James Buchanan avatar
    James Buchanan
    Director and Specialist

    James is an expert in examining and valuing stringed musical instruments. He has worked for Bonhams, Christies, and was a founding member of Brompton’s.

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